Small Adventures

I’m ready for an adventure. Don’t get me wrong, everyday with a 2 year-old and 3 month-old can be an adventure. I’m just ready for one that doesn’t include dirty diapers and snotty noses. I love my boys, in all their glory, I just have a longing that needs fulfilled.
It could be as simple as a quiet coffee shop and my book. It could be a shopping trip with my girls. It could be a visit to a winery. On more than one occasion I have dreamed of a sunrise horseback ride with my hubby. I think these are all romantic notions that I have dreamed up in my spare moments of solitude. Is it wrong that I lay awake at night and yearn for small adventures like this? I hope it’s not wrong to want these things. My kids are my world. I think as mothers and parents, we often feel a pang of guilt after any inkling of fun that may not involve our kids. Being a mother is the most rewarding job I have ever had. It is also, by far, the most exhausting. A hotel bed with crisp, clean sheets, a television, and no alarm set is one of the most amazing pictures I can paint in my mind. I also dream of fancy dinners where my main concern is what drink I will pair with my meal instead of where did the crayons fall on the floor or when was the last time my 2 year-old washed his hands?
I often feel that if I don’t make an effort to at least dream of these adventures then I am doing everyone I talk to an injustice. For example, talking with people who do not have children or have grown children, often can be a disaster of a conversation for me. I notice that it’s usually my go to conversation piece. Some people don’t want kids or can not have children. Therefore, they have zero interest in hearing what crazy, awesome thing my 2 year-old did the other day. I sometimes feel guilty talking to people who also have kids. Are we robbing each other of these few precious moments where our lives do not revolve around those munchkins? I mean, let’s think about it. On average, my husband and I spend one night a year together away from the kids. That means 364 days, we see/talk/think about the kids and their needs. If our life is at all similar to any other couple with children, then that does not leave much time (save the middle of the night or in between bites of food and screaming children) to talk to each other or other adults. So, if we are going to have a baby sitter and a night out with friends (who have children) is it wrong to try and talk about anything other than your kids? I enjoy an adult conversation once a year that doesn’t involve poop or the newest virus going around the daycare. Does that make me a bad person? My simple answer to this is no. No, I will continue to dream about having those adventures. Life without dreams is a sad one. Will I have a chance to do all of the things on my adventure list this year? Probably not. Will I have a chance to do one of them? I hope so.

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