Feverish Thoughts

I distinctly remember when the perspective of my own life changed. It was the strangest thing. I think I was about 10 years old. I had been sick and I had been home from school a few days. Since both my parents worked, I was at my grandma’s house. I remember it like it just happened. I was standing in my grandmother’s living room. I remember thinking, “nothing looks the same anymore.” I looked around the living room and saw everything for the first time. Everything was exactly the same as it had been 5 minutes before, but I was seeing it completely different. What was happening to me? The floor was still the floor. The furniture was the same. Nothing in the room had changed. It was like I took a pair of glasses off that I had no idea I had been wearing.
What happened to me that day? Was that my innocence slipping away? Was that some chemical imbalance that was fixing itself? Was there some invisible person shaking me out of a fog?
I also wonder now if maybe I was just having a fit of fever. Just kidding, I think. I find myself thinking about that day often. How many of these experiences does one person have in their lifetime? I want to know if I am going to wake up one day and think everything looks different again?
It could also be possible that we go through life and our perspective is constantly changing now. Maybe the 10 year-old sick me was just becoming aware that things change often. Or, maybe my memories are constantly changing. Or maybe there was a darker trigger for my change in perspective. Regardless, today I feel the same as yesterday. I’m just tired, with dirtier hair and feverish thoughts.



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s