Horticulturally Challenged

Today I bought a starter pot for herbs. Please feel free to laugh. I decided that if I can grow these herbs, then I will start trying to do something with my yard and landscape. My mother has a green thumb. She also has the greatest ideas when it comes to “landscape architecture”. I’m over here like, “I have killed three cacti.”
I have decided that now that I am a mother, maybe I will feel like nurturing these plants. Maybe there is a direct correlation between having kids and taking care of flowers. Why haven’t I ever thought about this before? Maybe the years before Cooper were like the years before I cared about plants! This is all making so much sense right now! Before Cooper, I enjoyed alcohol, sleeping late and being, for a lack of a better word, selfish. The same with the plants. Before, I didn’t want to take the time to water them, trim them or repot them. I get so excited when my son learns new things. I love watching him grow. Could it be possible that I can feel similar emotions towards flowers that I am trying to nurture along? P.S. I know nothing about flowers, plants or gardens. It’s okay though, because before I moved here, I knew nothing about horses, chickens or cows. I’m not saying I am an expert on any of them now, but at least I was able to adapt and learn.
I am going to do some research about what will grow in my yard. I may possibly attend one of those groups where a professional comes and speaks on flowers (kinda like How to Plant Flowers for Dummies). I am also going to look to friends for some advice.
I have no idea where to start on my yard. I have large ugly bushes that I want to pull out. I have vast, uninhabitable flower beds. I feel like my front yard has zero personality. I don’t want to be that house. I don’t want to look uninviting. I think the cemetery down the road has more curb appeal than my yard. I mean, when do you even plant flowers? Is this the time? How do you decide which flowers to put where? How do you get them arranged in the beds so everything looks symmetrical? How many times a week should I water? What flowers can live in shade? Do I have to use Miracle- Gro? How often? And, what in the heck is a Crepe Myrtle?
Clearly, I am horticulturally challenged. If I never post another thing about plants, that means my herb starter pot turned herb starter fail.

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