I Don’t Do Lonely Well

Baby since you been gone
I leave the TV on
Gotta hear somebody’s voice
I just need some kind of noise

I lay some pillows down
To wrap my arms around
I pretend I’m holding you
I know it’s sad but it’s what I do
To keep me from going crazy

Those are some lyrics from Jason Aldean’s song, “I Don’t Do Lonely Well”. I was driving in the car today and I heard this song. I had one of those moments where I just felt like the song spoke to me. I do leave the TV on and I do hug the pillows a lot. I get really emotional when I think about how last year at this time, I was sharing the bed with my husband. It seems like that was a lifetime ago. I know this isn’t what we had planned when we said “I do”. I just keep praying that God has a plan for us and our marriage. I know that he will reveal it in his own time. I just need to be patient.
We have been pretty busy this week. I really enjoy busy weeks. I would like to say a special thank you to all my friends and family who are the best kind of distraction from my somewhat lonely frame of mind. This past week, Cooper and I were blessed enough to be a part of a wonderful celebration for a 40th birthday. We had lunch, went to a Bible study, hosted a meeting, shared meals with family and friends and had play dates. These are the wonderful things that make up our days.
This week, I also printed and filled out an application for a job. As soon as I finished signing my name, I wished I had never started it. I looked over at my son sleeping. He was so peaceful. He even smiled and laughed a little during his slumber. Just watching him, I knew I wasn’t ready to go back to work. My heart flutters every time he smiles at me. I think it’s because I see his daddy. He looks at me with so much love and so much trust, I can’t imagine giving up that precious time with my son to go to a job that I don’t love every day.
On a lighter note, I bought some paint samples to try out in my dining room and foyer. If all goes well, I will post some pictures next week.

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5 thoughts on “I Don’t Do Lonely Well

  1. I see decals and Facebook sites all about “Spoiled Pipeliner Wfe” But the truth is, it is pretty lonely. Been in Oklahoma since before Christmas and it has been so lonely, cold, nothing to do in a tiny desolate town surrounded by other desolate towns. My husband comes home, showers, eats then falls off to sleep. He works hard. It’s just my little girl and I all day and then I have time to myself after they both drift off to do nothing much. I’m depressed. We travel together but rarely get to hang out, he works now seven days a week. I am away from friends, family in desolate towns. Honestly, not traveling with a pipeliner husband is lonely too but if you are living around friends and family at least there is that. It is lonely either way.

    • Tera–
      It is so great to hear that I am not as crazy as I sometimes think I am. Oklahoma is the worst. Everyone keeps telling me that it could be worse, he could be farther away. I know this is the truth..but then I wonder how many of these people have actually spent time in that depressing place. It hurts my eyes to drive up 35 north. I feel like there is nothing for miles and miles. You are a very good wife to stay there with your little one in that cold house. I couldn’t imagine trying to warm a room for an hour.
      Have y’all been married long? I totally agree with you about the shopping. I remember thinking pipeline wives shopped and got their nails done all day. I guess there are a good amount who do fit that stereotype. Then there are the ones like us who would rather save the money our husbands make through sacrificing their precious time away from their families.
      What do you do to help you function with the way things are? That is a lot of the reason I started this blog. If you have a blog, please let me know. I would love to follow it!

  2. Before I had a baby I would get out and travel to neighboring towns and take photos, explore…I also would work out, knit, crochet, look through thrift stores for cool things. Now I stay home with our lil girl and we just enjoy each other, learn new things, play, read, make yummy baby food and gobble it up 🙂 I do keep a blog that helps to focus on the good things and what I am grateful for.

    • I am also a wife who stays in our hometown while he is 600 miles away working. I work a full time job then come home to be with the kids (4). I miss him so much. We FaceTime and talk every day but its not the same as him being home. I have no idea what is is like to be a “spoiled” wife. I miss my husband my soulmate. I consider myself spoiled when we get to spend time together. He also works, eats then falls asleep because he is so tired. You are not alone. I’m glad to find out that I’m not alone. I was beginning to wonder. It gives me a little comfort knowing I’m not.

      • Thank you so much for sharing! It makes for some lonely days and nights, but I 100% agree with you! The time that you do get to spend together is so precious. It’s like you don’t want to share him with anyone. I can’t imagine doing it with 4 kids! You are my new hero!

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